Adjusting to Grief: Lamenting is Necessary - Guidely

Adjusting to Grief: Lamenting is Necessary

Adjusting to Grief


Last month was unprecedented and a lot of us are still adjusting to grief. If you lived in Texas and were not directly impacted by the lack of electricity in your homes, you most likely had relatives and friends over who were. And if that wasn’t your scenario, you probably witnessed and heard the stories of despair and hopelessness through the consistent coverage in the news and social media. It was a lot to experience and process. My irritation goes beyond the encounter. 

I was frustrated to see how so many of us went back to work on Monday morning as if nothing happened. We continued to stay on the hamster wheel of non-stop motion, never taking the time to pause or even stop.  There were limited conversations or check-ins, just work as usual because we have fallen into the trap that profit and productivity rule over people.  


Adjusting to Grief

In addition to last month’s debacle, over 500,000 people have died from COVID or COVID-related complications.  So many family members and friends have experienced loss. The institutional knowledge as well as the potential that we will never realize and know is now gone. And yet, we continue to move on without taking the time to stop and realize the devastation of this unseen enemy that is taking a toll on life as we know it.  

Our lives have radically changed. Many of us have been in our homes since March 2020 with limited human contact.  Hugs and opportunities to experience the presence of others are almost non-existent except for Zoom calls and Grocery store runs. On February 4th, 2021, Dallas Morning News headlines read, “With 1 of every 5 high schoolers not attending classes with regularity, Dallas ISD launches reconnection effort”.  As much as we tell ourselves that our children are resilient, they are obviously having a hard time adjusting too.  We keep running, moving faster as if it will suddenly go away and things will go back to normal. 


The Importance of Reflecting

In our quest, to keep up this busyness and maintain the desire to move forward, we are neglecting to pause, stop, and lament.  In grammar, the comma represents a pause and the period is used as a stop before moving to the next thought. Why is it that we understand these concepts in language, but have failed to see the need in our lives?

Right now, we really need to sit back, reflect, and listen. God/The Universe is speaking, and we are missing it big time by covering it up with more stuff. Stuff that has yet to alleviate our pain and suffering.  

It is time for us to pause, stop, cry, reflect, and wait quietly to hear from God. Our very lives depend upon it. 

Guide, Dr. Froswa Booker-Drew on Grief


The grieving process

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